The weekend was quite fun. Friday Jeffrey and I just hung out at the house and relaxed. It's nice to actually spend time with him and around him (even if we are doing different things) and feeling close to him. It's quite a change from how it used to be. I went to a thrift store and got a rad t-shirt for 2 dollars. It was a stellar buy. That about sums up Friday.
Saturday Jeffrey and I went to Bowl and Pitcher again. We took along some steaks, corn, and pickles and had a little cook out. It was my first official day of not wearing TEDS. That in itself was liberating. However, my body isn't in it's equilibrium yet, so I'm still swollen in my legs and middle. I get frustrated at myself for continuing the behaviors even though I know it continues to worsen my edema. I need to tell someone (ie, Jeffrey) when I feel like doing something before I do it. I can't let this continue to torment me. Anyway, we took Phantom with us. Granted, pugs aren't the best dogs to take outdoors...not just because of the heat, but because they're basically lazy dogs. He had a good time though: eating steak, fetching pine cones, smelling rocks. He's a great dog. We went down rocks so I could play in the water. It was cold. I wanted to get pictures because I'm a fan :) Our steak was deliciously seasoned (yay, self) and I taught Jeffrey that it's possible to cook corn on the coals in their husks. It was really hot outside (like, 89) so we left after our lunch.
We went back home and I made pasta salad and Jeff's new favorite cookies: peanut butter reese's pieces cookies to take to the Gordley's house (they invited us over for fondue). We brought Phantom over to see how he would react to their dog, Keaton, who is basically like a miniture Husky and it was interesting. At first, he was terrified, naturally, but as the evening went on, he kept harrassing Keaton to chase and play with him. For hours. I can't imagine what having two puggys around would be like. Chaos. Jeffrey is now a fan of fondue. I asked him if he wanted a set of pots for Christmas but he said that it was silly. Ahh the winds of change.
Today was pretty boring. Church, lunch, chill, dinner, chill. It's been really hot for the past couple days. That kinda bums me out. I've been gaining and I needed to because I lost quite a bit last week, but it makes me so uncomfortable and self-concious. Saturday morning I woke up thinking about why and how I need to go about not eating and my eating disorder started to sing a song in my head. I over-powered ED's voice by asking myself "what good will that accomplish?" If I go back to that, where will I be? Alone. Miserable. So I guess that's a start. I just need to have that minset all the time. I wish I knew how to do that though.
